I have been home for about a week now and it has been peaceful, weird, and convicting. The first lesson I learned 3 days into being home, is that God is never really done. He never stops teaching us about ourselves, whether it is through His word or other people. Since I have been home, I haven't stop apologizing to my family for being the worst.
I guess if someone asked me what I have been doing in the past few days I have been home, I probably would say that I have been sitting in the Lord 's kindness. A year ago, being shown all the things that are wrong with me, I would have been throwing a self-pity party. But now, having been shown by God who I am but at the same time whose I am, has been the most life-changing thing.
That's the thing! As we journey with God, I mean really journey with Him. He will teach us how to not only deal with tests and trials, but to overcome them. To overcome them in the way that our faith will be increased and we will trust Him more than we did before. That...is nothing but the kindness of God.
One my favorite people in the Bible is David. I love him! My favorite thing about him is the way that he worships. I read the full story of David as I was reading through the Bible and I was shocked a bit by how many mistakes he made. But what made me weep, is that he always worshipped the Lord. He NEVER STOPPED WORSHIPPING! And God...NEVER STOPPED RESPONDING!
So in this time where I find myself sitting in the hard things, in the waiting, in my mistakes, in the memories, and in the kindness of God. I will continue to worship the Lord. I will use my mouth to give Him all the praise and the honor. Spending time in prayer and supplication and basking in the sweetness and kindness of God. That is where my faith will increase and it will stick. Because my faith is not in the thing, my faith is in the king who WILL respond.
